Kitty's Breasts

Now I am not one to brag and believe me that is not what my intention is with this blog today but I have gotten a few compliments on my breasts recently. I never thought much of it. See, these old breasts of mine are “retired”. They were “working breasts” when my kids were young. While I believe they could use a little “lift” I am pretty satisfied with their size. You will have to just use your imagination on that I think. Sure, I could tell you but what fun would that be?

I have this one blouse. It’s not exactly my favorite and the color is not great but for some reason when I wear this particular blouse I almost always get a compliment on my breasts from the Angry Guy. For him to notice my body at all is quite something believe me. So I try to wear this blouse at least once a week even though like I said, it’s not in my opinion the most flattering.

The reason I am mentioning this is because on Christmas morning as I was opening my gifts, one of the gifts was an interesting piece of clothing. Now let me point out that Angry Guy generally does not buy me clothes. That is a good thing, believe me. Also, Angry Guy had to work Christmas morning so he wasn’t actually there to see the look on my face when I opened the gifts he had gotten for me.

So the thing that made this piece of clothing so interesting is that it looked almost identical to the blouse that Angry Guy loves my breasts in. The color is the same which is a color that I never wear and I don’t think I look good in. The neckline is plunging. The fit is snug and there are even the same tiny little buttons running down the front. I can’t tell you how many times I wore that original blouse in the hopes that a man would be running his fingers down that button placket as he unbuttoned each and every little button.

So I am sitting here this morning typing this after trying on my Christmas gift wondering if Angry Guy purchased this blouse with the idea that it will accentuate my breasts which he claims to think so highly of. I could ask him but of course what fun would that be?

The Games People Play

Kitty received an angry email the other day from a former lover who was insulted by the past few posts that I had written about the men in my life who just disappear.

And while I am sorry if anybody’s feelings got hurt, I wrote and will continue to write about how I FEEL. If you want to write about how YOU FEEL then be my guest. I will even post it if you ask me to (and send it in Word form).

The thing is that this particular person confessed that he had been sitting back and waiting to see what I wrote about him. So basically he was “TESTING” Kitty. Needless to say Kitty FAILED the test. I guess I never mentioned that I am not a very good test taker especially if I haven’t had the opportunity to “study”.

Now to me that whole “testing” thing is BULLSHIT! I don’t play those games. If I did, believe me all these guys would FAIL. Believe me when I say that my standards for a lover are well below my standards for a husband so Kitty makes a point of not expecting too much from these men.

Oh sure, I prefer if they had character and were truthful but “TESTING” them? Keeping track of their every move? Kitty has no time for that. All I ask is for a little consideration and if you say you are going to do something…DO IT! Oh, and some communication.

Bottom line is if you have time to skulk around my blog everyday then you have the time to shoot me an email telling me something nice. End of story and yes, Kitty FAILED the test. Kitty has no time for tests or games. Kitty will now “Return to ‘Go’ without collecting $200”.

Inappropriate Kitty

When is Kitty ever going to learn my lesson? Well, hopefully today but one can never know for sure. It’s the Monday after New Years. I had to be in the office all alone but boy was I bitter. Who could blame me? I didn’t sleep well and Big Cheese was out of town. I wasn’t sure if XXX would be in but I knew his assistants were out so I figured I’d email him. This is how it went:

Kitty:  Are you in the office today?

XXX: My son and I are in.

You are holding down the fort without Big Cheese?

Kitty: UGH! Yes! I am SO BORED and have to bill a client for this!

How was New Year's? I didn't understand what you meant by "retarded funny".

XXX: I am retarded for continuing my marriage. It is now surreal.

How was your New Years?

Did you run the 40 yard dash?

Kitty: We had a nice time. We went out for dinner. You know it makes me cringe when you use the expression "40 yard dash" and the answer is "NO".

So did you go out with your friends on New Year's Eve or just stay home?

XXX: [My son] is part of a group of boys and the parents are friendly. So we went over there. Had a beer, smoked a cigar with the men around a fire pit. I felt very manly. It was good.

[Wife] hurt her back pretty bad in her workout class, she is super stressed around the holidays and so I am letting her have her space. I haven't seen her in days and [My son] has just been with me. She texted me an "I love you" so, who knows. The only time I get any response, is when I leave her alone. But this fucking separation is costing a fortune. I'm gonna move back into the shed in the back yard. I did live in the office for a few nights…

Kitty: UGH! Yes, that IS fucking retarded!!!

LOL well [Your wife] sounds like quite a handful.

That just sucks [XXX]! Can you negotiate the lease or find a cheaper place or tell [Your wife] to pay her own FUCKING way??? Just a suggestion.

I was going to ask if you considered maybe picking up where "we" left off but your shed will just not do.

XXX: The shed had its charms. You might like it. We could play "Grizzly Adams and the Indian Maiden".

Kitty: Would I get to be Grizzly Adams??? Does he wear a fur coat?? January is not the greatest time to "RUN THE 40 YARD DASH" in your shed...just sayin'. I'm not a snob I would just have a lot to explain if I got hypothermia around my private area ;)

XXX: Alright, enough. [My assistant] is going to draw the wrong conclusions from this exchange.

Kitty: JEEZ-US! Can't you delete them or something?!?!?!

P.S. Why can't we just be like normal people and have sex in the office?

XXX: lol

Okay. The floor is now open for your comments. Yes, Kitty is many things in this exchange. I am naughty, I am inappropriate and I am not sure if you can tell or not but Kitty was completely turned on by the Grizzly Adams comment! Can I just point out that one of the reasons I am including this email exchange verbatim is for you all to get a feel for how easy it is for me to say something like “Hey, let’s start our affair again?” When it comes to XXX and me we don’t mince words. We don’t have to. No games. That part I love. At any time either one of us can email the other "Let's go fuck". Okay, XXX is more discrete and would email,"Alternative plan." WHATEVER!

After I was done at work I stopped by his office. We talked quietly as his son sat in the next room. XXX explained to me that he is unable to delete that email conversation that we had and that it WOULD be monitored but he didn’t care anymore. LOVELY!! So now Kitty knows for sure not to engage via email. I just figured since he was so damn careful our first time around that he knew of a way to get rid of the evidence. Apparently not. I am sure I’ll get some looks tomorrow from XXX’s assistant.

In the meantime XXX said over and over, “I am beginning to come around to your way of thinking, Kitty. I am beginning to believe that the way to go is to stay married let her live her life and have a mistress. We looked each other in the eyes and it was understood that when and if the time came…

Scarlet Letter Kitty

Kitty has all sorts of friends trying to keep me out of trouble lately. It’s like they are on some sort of “Save Kitty’s Soul” campaign. I don’t know what that’s about but I do love my friends for trying at least. They see something in me. They feel like my soul is worth saving. Kitty is a kind person and would not intentionally hurt another living soul. I know I will find my way.

So one of Kitty’s friends is my gym buddy. The other day we went to the gym. Now when Kitty goes to the gym I never worry about how I look. When Kitty is with my friend nobody and I mean NOBODY looks at Kitty because they are too busy looking at my friend who is a very slim blonde with implants. So Blondie and I were at the gym “working out”. She was lifting weights and Kitty was pretending to exercise. I was lying on the floor next to Blondie talking with her. I began doing pelvic thrusts not really paying attention. Blondie was talking to Muscle Man who seems to ADORE Blondie almost as much as he adores himself. Suddenly I realize that Muscle Man was glaring at me as I did my thrusts. This made Kitty a little uncomfortable. We had a quick exchange then Muscle Man left.

Today I was in class. Blondie was teaching the class. I was planking on my mat like a good Kitty. At 6:00 a.m. Kitty doesn’t talk to ANYBODY so I was minding my own business. Suddenly Muscle Man comes into class and sets his mat up right next to me. This is strange only because Kitty was in the front of the room and Muscle Man generally sets up in the back…with his WIFE.

Muscle Man got into his plank and began talking to me. Meanwhile I am thinking “Dude, get away from me. If your wife sees this she is going to gut me like one of the Seven freakin’ fishes on Christmas Eve!” Muscle Man would not quit. He was starting to draw attention to us which is not good. Keep in mind that both of us KNOW everybody in the class. We live in a teeny tiny community so this shit is not cool.

Once class ended Kitty gathered my things and began to walk out. Wouldn’t you know that Muscle Man followed close behind? Where the hell was this guy’s wife?!?!?! I glanced back to make sure that he wasn’t going to step on me from behind when he said “Hey, we should hook-up sometime.”

I had to stop. As soon as I did I knew it was wrong but I said “what?”

He looked at me again and smiled a crooked smile and repeated “We should hook-up…you know…”

Now here is the thing about Muscle Man that intrigues me. Muscle Man is a “hunter” and Kitty LOVES “hunters”. Now when I say “hunter” I mean there are certain men out there that are forceful and let it be known what they want in and out of bed. That is EXACTLY what Kitty needs. That is EXACTLY what Kitty craves.

Kitty loves a man who knows what he wants. I love a man who takes charge and stakes a claim on Kitty. I love a man who makes the plan and says “BE THERE”. Most importantly I love a man who takes charge in bed and tells Kitty what to do. I am in charge all day long everyday so there is nothing nicer than someone else taking the lead.

Sadly, even though Muscle Man is exactly what the doctor ordered he is obviously not what I would consider “discrete”. I am not kidding when I say that his wife would gut me like a fish. She is WAY scary to me.

Well in the meantime Kitty is just going to have to pass on Muscle Man’s very kind offer.

Fucking XXX…Again

This morning Kitty woke up and I felt FRISKY! I was due to work with XXX in the afternoon and figured since we were going into the New Year’s weekend he would be grumpy so I decided to wear something sexy. I thought this might lift his spirits. So I wore the tight blouse that Angry Guy says makes my breasts look good, black leggings and knee high black boots. I also wore my black bra and panties because with XXX you just never know. My only regret was that I didn’t have time to paint my nails red. I am not sure if guys find red nails sexy but I always feel like if my feet are going to be up by guy’s ears they should at least look nice.

Chances of things with XXX moving that quickly are slim to none anyway so I didn’t stress too much about the nails.

I got into the office before he did but Big Cheese ran into him and made a point of telling me that he looked “haggard”. Now I know what I am about to say is going to seem manipulative but that “haggard” look could possibly be good for Kitty so I can’t say that I was sorry to hear that news and I was looking forward to going into his office to “brighten his day”.

In the past on those “haggard” days Kitty would get an email or a text requesting putting our “alternative project” in action which was code for meeting him back at his place at lunch time.

Today however he was beside himself which is well beyond haggard and not good at all for Kitty…or his assistant apparently. The final die was cast and it is official that he will not be moving back into his house anytime soon. He made a point of announcing it publically to all of us this afternoon which was borderline inappropriate office behavior even by my standards. Oh, Kitty tried to smooth things over but the fact that it was the Friday before New Year’s just made it impossible so I decided to let him vent and hope that 1. His cunt wife at least play nice for the weekend or 2. He calm down and maybe consider talking things through with Kitty on Monday.

I have to work on Monday even though nobody else will be and XXX has already warned me that if things don’t go well over the weekend he will be working too. I DO want things to go well for him but if he is in on Monday at the very least we can have a conversation without being monitored by his assistants.

So Kitty has been tossing the idea of getting back together with XXX and yes, it is premature but Kitty needs to be on my toes with him. He is a hunter which I love but when and if he comes to me he will want to fuck right then and there so I better be ready. Also, I never discussed the “scare” with him so I have to give the whole condom issue more thought.

Aside from that there are some good things that can come out of getting back together with XXX.

1.     I know what he likes in bed and he has made it clear on several occasions that I more than satisfy his desires. I am pretty comfortable now working with XXX on making the sex better. He is well aware that other men satisfied me since him and XXX being a goal oriented man will want to achieve the same so I can see us concentrating a little more on my needs to get me where I need to be.

2.     Kitty has the upper hand to some degree this time around. Now don’t get all crazy about that expression. Kitty is not one to take advantage. All I mean is that this time around I am confident that I can create more distance between XXX and me in that I won’t need to text him or call him when I don’t see him. Kitty is more secure than I was the first time around with XXX.

3.     After fucking all the jerks I have fucked since XXX it has become apparent what a GEM he really is. I know it is difficult to portray his personality especially if you read my angry posts when we split up but the thing that makes XXX better than the rest and better than I portrayed him is that he did and consistently DOES make a point of trying to create peaceful closure to our affair. The problem at the time wasn’t that he was sneaking around or ignoring me or anything. The problem was that I flew off the handle before he had the chance to tell me anything. XXX was always all about sparing my feelings to a fault. I guessed what was happening and immediately went ballistic. If XXX had it his way he would have sat me down in a private place and tried to explain things calmly. I don’t see how that would have been any better but things happened for a reason and “we made it through the rain” as Barry Manilow would say.

4.     As far as working together if we reunite. I don’t see that as a problem really. We’ve done it before and we’ve been doing it since.

Now Kitty is not stupid and yes I know that there will always be issues between XXX and I. XXX and I love each other but will never be together as a married couple. We both realize that and that may be a good thing. But there are definitely things that would not be good about getting back together with XXX.

1.     As awful as she is, XXX will always love his wife more than anything. Now Kitty is not trying to be XXX’s wife but it is totally annoying how much he idolizes her even though she tramples on his heart consistently. I am not sure why the hell after over 2 years she decided to take him back but I don’t want to have my relationship with XXX based upon her fucking whim.

2.     Kitty would be much more assertive about telling XXX what things bother me in the way of conversation. Kitty wanted to be that lover that XXX could talk to about anything. I wanted him to feel free to discuss his girlfriends, his wife…whatever. And I still do want to be that for him. But I think we may have to have a sexy time rule where there is no talking about his wife or his girlfriends while he is inside me or on top of me without any clothing. That seems like a fair request to me don’t you think? I am sure XXX won’t have an issue with this. We have touched upon the issue recently and believe me when I tell you that like an idiot I was the one who encouraged him but I will have to stop that.

3.     We are also going to have to stop discussing “When it’s over”. That was a regular topic between us as we both tried to be realistic about our affair and our love for each other not having a fairytale ending. That discussion is a party killer and I just won’t have it this time around.

Other than that I think I could probably get used to gazing into XXX’s crystal blue eyes in his kitchen as he gives me that first warm kiss of the afternoon. I can fall back in the habit of walking up to his bedroom behind him as he holds my hand. I will have no problem feeling his warm naked body next to mine moving with his rock hard cock inside of me. I can get used to him calling out my name again and again. These things won’t be difficult to fall back into with XXX. I know that XXX is making the same list. That we have in common. In fact I think I saw it on his desk today but before he comes to me XXX will have to come to the conclusion on his own. I believe he will. He’s hurting now and I am hoping the weekend is not too hard on him. I have already shared my concern for his mental and physical health over this. I can be there for XXX at some point but there are some things that he has to deal with on his own first.

So for now Kitty has to wait.

My Little Latino Helper

My Little Latino Helper told me that he broke up with his girlfriend today. He told me that they are going to remain friends so that’s good. Um…so what the fuck is Kitty going to do with the REST of the information??? Oh yeah, did I mention that Big Cheese is going away for the holidays so I will have the office all to myself?

Now in reality I don’t know if I would REALLY fuck my Little Latino Helper. I mean trust me he IS cute but he is cute in a puppy sort of way and you all know Kitty has a “Daddy” complex even though I like to joke about fucking young boys the truth is nothing makes Kitty wet like a guy my age or older.

 My Little Latino Helper has that sexy accent true. And yes, it is true that Kitty has never fucked a Latin man before. Are they supposed to be well endowed? My Little Latino Helper would definitely need to wear a condom. Bummer. The men I have been with lately have had vasectomies. Kitty digs that because it takes some of the worry away…do you all remember that pre-Halloween scare that Kitty had? Well Kitty would have a tough time explaining a Little Latino Baby to Angry Guy. I bet My Little Latino Helper moans when he cums and Kitty LOVES a moaner. Hmmmm

I wonder what positions My Little Latino Helper enjoys. I wonder if he fantasizes about fucking me on Big Cheese’s desk. I wonder if he fantasizes about bending me over. XXX used to fantasize about the exact same things I did even before we started fucking.

Oh God! If XXX ever found out about My Little Latino Helper, I would never hear the end of it. Something tells me that My Little Latino Helper is not very discrete. That could be very very bad for Kitty.

So the next few weeks should be interesting. Kitty has not had any playtime in a long time. Kitty is VERY frisky. Hmmmm…what should Kitty do????

Women In Control

I just had a really nice conversation with Bad Boy. Coincidentally it is the day that I posted the Holiday Greetings blog about him so of course he got off the phone with me and read it. Luckily he liked it. I am always concerned the person I am writing about will read something into what I have written…something that I did not mean for them to read into.

So Bad Boy had read a little bit of my blog before we spoke on the phone. He was a little confused. Bad Boy had NO IDEA that I was Naughty Kitty!!! Funny right? Because most of you ONLY know me as Naughty Kitty.

So over the course of an hour or so Bad Boy and I discussed my adventures with Ashley Madison. Now Bad Boy is very fashion forward when it comes to sex so nothing I tell him would ever shock him. Also, chances are whatever I have done, he did 20 years prior. Yes, Kitty is way behind in the times and Bad Boy has lived up to his name but you all know that already.

So I was telling Bad Boy about each of the men I have been with and how each of them has disappeared from my life without having the courage to give me notice often after blowing smoke up my ass about having a long term affair. And I said to Bad Boy “What the fuck? I have told these guys that I am okay with just meeting once and many of them insist they are looking for more than just one meeting. They SAY they want to meet again and then they disappear.”

Do you know what that Bad Boy told me? Bad Boy told me…and I am paraphrasing here…Bad Boy told me that “women have all the power” and that in order to get the control back men do shit like that to women like me. Like I said…I am paraphrasing.

My response to Bad Boy was “Men are ASSHOLES!”

Bad Boy replied, “Yes, some are.”

I also said “It’s a shame really because if those fucking men would stop playing games we could have really had something nice.” Bad Boy agreed.

And so if you are one of the men who fucked Kitty and dumped me after swearing that you wouldn’t (there are several of you and you KNOW WHO YOU ARE), you are a COWARD and your punishment is yet another clip from “Sex and the City.”

So now you are in control but don't have Naughty Kitty. That's just fucking STUPID if you ask me.

P.S. Dumping Kitty without so much as a "goodbye" is even SHITTIER than breaking up on a post it note.