I woke up with a bad feeling today. I am due to meet T-Bone. I don’t have a bad feeling about him. I have a bad feeling about the timing. Maybe “bad” is not a great word…UNEASY.
I started feeling differently when my client and I decided to meet. There is a part of me that wants to save all of my energy for him. Our meeting is tentative. It can be cancelled based on his schedule at any time. In fact we were joking yesterday and as I told him “I am basically ‘on call’”. Even though my client and I agreed to meet I had made a commitment to T-Bone and didn’t want to let him down.
This uneasy feeling has more to do with Angry Guy and the kids. I feel much more at ease at my encounters when Angry Guy is at ease. The coffee thing with XXX put Angry Guy on alert which makes me jumpy then paranoid. So, Angry Guy goes off to work without a word about yesterday then the kids start waking up. My daughter woke up not feeling well. That is another thing that puts me on edge. The school nurse can call anytime. If I don’t pick up my cell the call goes right to Angry Guy’s phone. If he can’t reach me…well…it’s all over.
I considered texting T-Bone just to let him know what was going on. Maybe he has something similar going on at his house. Maybe he will want to postpone. Maybe he has a bad…uneasy feeling as well.