Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Best Friends

Kitty has a new best friend. Well, actually we WERE best friends…then we fucked…then we were lovers…then we broke up…then we were enemies (well…I was)…then Kitty saw the light…and now we are friends again. Yep, you got it! XXX and I are friends again.

I know you are saying “Kitty, what the fuck is wrong with you? He broke your HEART!” I know, I know but the truth is that I am partially responsible for letting it happen . I agreed to one thing with XXX hoping for something different. XXX can’t read my mind.

So after I went to XXX and told him that I missed his friendship he was all relieved. See, there are benefits to being friends with an ex lover. For one thing I was able to share the Ashley Madison gossip about the local “doctor”. I just HAD to share that with SOMEONE and since XXX is the only person who knows about me and Ashley Madison…well…he was the likely recipient of the gossip. Plus he appreciated it which made it all the more sweet.

So I was sitting in XXX’s office eating lunch and we were chatting just like old times. He was asking me what was going on in my life. He was asking me if I have been on Ashley Madison lately. It’s cute that he thinks he is the only guy I fucked even though I told him there were others. He sort of has a little mental block about it.

Then there was a moment when he leaned in real close to whisper. He had to because his assistants were all outside his door. Then we started talking about what happened between us. He said he was sorry about how it ended and he didn’t mean to hurt me. For the first time I believed him. I told him that I wasn’t completely truthful with him.

I told him that all the times I told him that it didn’t bother me when he talked about his Match.com dates and his wife after fucking me that I was lying. I confessed that I wanted to be that friend who could fuck him then listen to that shit but I just couldn’t.

I reminded him of all the times he told me that he gave and gave to his wife and she never gave back. I told him that was like he and I only I gave and gave and he took and took. Then I told him that the reason I did it was because I thought we would last longer and I thought eventually things would even out.

He understood. No, he REALLY seemed to understand. It makes such a difference when you say something like that to someone and they REALLY seem to understand.

Then I asked him if he ever thinks about me. And he said he does. He said he didn’t want things to end the way they did but he has to follow through with this thing with his wife. I told him I understand and I agree and I do…I really really do.

He said he should not have approached me that beautiful, sunny, warm day in September. He said he knew it was a mistake. He said he knew it was wrong. I disagree. There were good things and bad things about our affair but I have to say now that it is over and we are friends again, I am glad that we made it through. It truly has made us special friends. I can share things with XXX that I simply can’t share with Angry Guy. And now XXX can in fact share things about his wife and it doesn’t hurt to hear them. Maybe being fully clothed makes a difference.

One thing that I love about being friends again with XXX is that I can ask him a question and say “Be honest” and he actually will. I forget what I had asked him at the end of our conversation but I do remember his answer which was “I love your personality and I am definitely sexually attracted to you.” To some women that would be considered sexual harassment but to me it is just plain complimentary.


Riff Dog said...

Funny about the "be honest" thing with him. I suppose because of the circumstances, we can be surprisingly honest with our paramours in ways we normally wouldn't.

Naughty Kitty said...

I have to say that XXX was not actually ever DIShonest unless you consider dishonesty by omission and even then...

He always tries to spare my feelings which I hate in this situation. I need for him to be brutally honest. I need for him to say "Kitty, you smelled." or "Kitty, you didn't give good head."

I address that briefly in an upcoming blog about Rav. Right up to the end XXX was trying to encourage me that Rav wasn't going to dump me and I know XXX knew. Afterall, he did the same thing :(

KittyCat said...

I think it was a mistake
to allow him
back into your life after he hurt you
go back and read your prev blogs
you wrote about him
how quick we forget the pain.
just my two cents

Naughty Kitty said...

Thanks for looking out for me KC. It's a little more complicated than that though. We were close friends before all this happened and right now he is the only friend here that I have that knows my secret. He comes to my office and hugs me every morning and checks in with me through the day when I am having a tough day. He is making a sincere effort to be here for me. I was angry at him but I was more angry at myself. He wasn't dishonest with me. He was going to tell me about his wife at a more appropriate time. I just happened to guess the news before he got a chance to tell me. Again, that was my fault for inappropriate behavior at work.

You don't have to worry. XXX is not going to hurt me anymore. We are friends and only friends. We will not go back to being lovers. We both agree on that.