She said XXX sounds like a good friend to me. He is with one exception. He is ALWAYS trying to spare my feelings which I hate. If I ask him a direct question and he thinks the answer will hurt he dances around the answer. I hate that and I am always honest with him. I always tell him that his ego is inflated. I tell him when he looks like shit and I remind him on occasion that although sex with him was pleasant at the time, he never made me cum.
So after my headshrinker appointment I actually did work with XXX. He asked how my session went. XXX has been trying to get me to go to a headshrinker for months so he is extremely supportive. Plus he goes to one so I guess it makes him feel better if I go too.
I began to tell XXX what the headshrinker was asking about him. He seemed satisfied with my answers until I got to the question about being in danger of starting our affair again. He winced a little when I told him that one especially when I told him that I told the headshrinker that we are not in ANY danger of starting our affair again.
When I saw the expression on his face change I couldn’t believe it. After all we have been through and this is still a sore spot for him?
So I rephrased the question and said “If I offered myself up for sex, you would say ‘no’, RIGHT?”
XXX just looked at me. He looked confused like I was speaking a foreign language. He looked me directly in the eyes, I am assuming to search for the answer I was looking for. I began to nod my head and say “YES, You would say ‘no’” He mimicked my nodding almost half heartedly then repeated “No, because I am committed to saving my marriage.” The weird thing is he didn’t seem to believe it. What the fuck, XXX?!?! SNAP OUT OF IT!
Then I said “And if you were to offer yourself up for sex I would say ‘NO’” I was a lot more confident when I said this to him.
He still seemed confused and I just don’t understand exactly why. We both agree it was fun while it lasted. We both agree that it ended badly. We both agree that we are happier being friends.
I for one have had better lovers before and after XXX so I have no desire to work like crazy to bring him to orgasm when I have no hope of having one with him. So, I ask you, WHAT THE FUCK?!