Sunday, January 15, 2012

Heartbroken

He walked out of my life today. Oh, I know he’ll be back. But it hurts just the same. I had him for such a short time. I fell in love with him at first sight. Even before, I think. When I look at him I get butterflies in my stomach. He is so beautiful that I want to cry. He is perfect in every way. He is smart and handsome and kind and God does he make me laugh.

I think he knew today would be difficult for me. We both knew it was the end…for now. He invited me to see the new Mark Wahlberg movie. He knows that Mark Wahlberg makes me wet. As we sat in the movie we joked about my “thing” for Mark. I shushed him every time Mark had a line. He laughed. As the movie progressed I got more and more tense. I knew that once the movie was over it was time for him to go and I was dreading it.

After the movie he went to the men’s room and I waited. I tried to fight back the tears. He insisted on walking me to my car and we made small talk but then it was time. I knew I had to let him go. I tried to fight the tears. He leaned down to kiss me. He is so much taller than me. I tried to stay focused on not crying. He turned to walk away then stopped and said “Stay out of trouble.” Then he smiled that gorgeous smile of his. The smile that turns me into a puddle of goo. All he has to do is flash that smile and his wish is my command.  I couldn’t speak. I smiled but he could tell that I was starting to crumble.

I got into my car and tried to pull away without him seeing me crack. I didn’t want to be the first to leave but I didn’t want him to see me cry. I didn’t want him to hear me as I cried out “Please don’t leave me!”
He texted me about two hours later, "I'm here safe and sound. Thanks for everything. I love you Mom."

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is lovely. Well written. It brought a tear to my eye, and a smile, too. Thanks!

N. said...

So sweet. Thanks!

Ryan Beaumont said...

Trust me you are in his life every day even if you are not in his physical presence. :)