Tuesday, May 1, 2012

The Do-Over

I have a “friend” from high school. We have remained in contact even before Facebook. This friend is the ultimate ego booster for me. He has contacted me through those reunion websites then again through Facebook and we have emailed off and on over the years…again…nothing inappropriate.
Anyway so Dude is all about the telephone conversation and I am all about NOT talking on the phone. WTF?!?! What woman hates the phone??? THIS ONE!!

Anyway so I was helping  #2 with his math homework which made me think of my friend and so I texted him to see if he wanted to talk.

So I think we talked for maybe 2 hours!! So, here is the background…My friend “Bad Boy” was in fact a bad boy in high school. Okay that is unfair. He had a REPUTATION for being a bad boy but in reality he was not bad at all. He used to TORTURE me although he says he doesn’t remember that and that was probably his way of showing affection…yeah…thanks for that because I am still scarred. That’s why I was thinking about him when I was helping #2 with his math.  Bad Boy was in my math class and not only did he torture me but he tortured the teachers as well.

 At the time I did not find this charming but I see his point now. He did the same thing in Latin and then one night asked me to “tutor” him…one Saturday night. Okay…yes…I was…am…naive…stupid. I did not realize that “tutor” meant something entirely different but boy did I find out.

So out of respect for “The Angry Man”  I will not go into too much detail but suffice it to say that I ended up being the one who got  “tutored” wink..wink.

So my only regret was that at the time I was extremely immature and Dude was trying to teach me stuff…like stuff that I can still use today…like a real TEACHER!! How many girls have THAT opportunity? UGH! I really WAS stupid.

So in the midst of our 2 freakin’ hour conversation I learned a few things about “Bad Boy”…

1.       He turned out to be a great guy and an upstanding law enforcement “type”.

2.       He has a totally sexy voice although he always did as I remember…oh, great teeth too by the way.

3.       He used to read my blog which is awesome…you know I always love a good stroking…ego stroking I mean.

4.       He has had a great deal of “experience” and so even though the prospect of us ever hooking up for a “do-over” is generally out of the question I wouldn’t be able to get over the mere intimidation of the fact that although open minded I am still ORDINARY in the bedroom by most standards…especially his.

5.       Dude did not impose himself on me back in the day which at the time was sort of a bummer. I was ready. I thought he was going to be my first…you know…the “first time”…and he was for a lot of things just not intercourse.

6.       He said I was a great…good kisser. Now although I would LOVE to believe him I have to wonder how the hell he would ever remember that because although I remember kissing him…A LOT…I do not remember specifics about how the kissing was. Was it wet? Warm? Sloppy? No, I guess I would remember bad kissing for sure. I know HE was a good kisser my doubt lies with whether or not he remembers if I was a good kisser.

And so the idea of the “Do-Over”. Would it be a good thing or a bad thing? Do we have an idea in our heads that are based on a memory that we WISHED had happened? Is he picturing me the way I used to be? I am sure he has not changed all that much except now he likes to talk on the phone and I do not. Back in the day…we didn’t do much talking…THAT much I remember.


redpl said...

Interesting. The first guy I slept with - long story but we had a very volatile relationship - we never really dated - we just hooked up. We had no idea what we were doing and we ended up "going together" after the deed - a little backwards. Anyway, we ended up hating each other (he was definitely a bad boy) and didn't talk ever again. I moved and found a new boyfriend who was my real high school sweetheart and pretended that he was my first instead of "bad boy". So many year later, bad boy contacted me thru fb which led to emails and a phone call - first time we talked in 15 years. It was like we were never apart - we talked of old times, remember when???, etc. This also led to more phone calls, texts, emails. Some became sexual in nature. He blew me away saying he remembered everything about me - "everything". He's divorced and I'm getting divorced - was already in the process when we started communicating - had to make that clear. He doesn't live near me but we were contemplating getting together perhaps for a do over as you say. Not sure about that. I could imagine it would be better the 2nd time around - we're more experienced and we're not 15. I have to say I am intrigued

JerZey Girl said...

Wow! AWESOME! I love that story! If you were to hook up as an "affair" I wouldn't hold out hope for a future but given the fact that you are both soon to be single I say "Why the hell not?!?!" and GO FOR IT! Now is the time in our lives to be adventurous and HAPPY.

As i said, my "Bad boy" and I do not meet and although "The Angry Man" would consider the mere idea of us communicating inappropriate I don't consider our relationship detrimental to my marriage and "Bad Boy" has never brought our conversation to that level. Although he has read this blog so I am sure if the opportunity ever presented itself he would "break off a little" for me ;)

Same sassy girl said...

There is something about a second chance, eh? You know what I am going to say. Been there, done that - GO FOR IT!

Ben said...

For an interesting read on the topic, get "Hold Me Tight" by Sue Johnson. It is about what the psychologists call attachment theory. Concerning early loves, look up the term "limerence." Myself, I do have very fond memories of my first love and first sexual intercourse. Had lunch a few years ago with my summer love of the time, and we laughed about the start of our "adult" lives.

Kitty, go for it.

Naughty Kitty said...

I have to apologize. This is a re-post that went ary (sp?). Someday Bad Boy and I hope to meet again but not in the near future. He lives way down south and plays with all the beautiful women down there for now. Read the "When Life Hands You Lemons" post below. That's the one that was meant to post today.

Ben said...

Enjoyed re-reading it ... must have missed the first time. I met a woman at a HS reunion a few years ago. In HS, I thought she was way to pretty for me. She was artsy. I was math/science. Now, she is lovely, interesting, cute, and long-term single. Lives in Atlanta, alas.