Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Passive Aggressive Much?

Angry Guy has been Needy/Sad Guy lately. I tend to think it’s a passive aggressive thing that he does. Occasionally he will look me directly in the eyes and say “Love me?” WAIT!!! STOP!!! I’ve fallen for this one too many times before. I have taken this opportunity on several occasions to open a dialogue about our sex life…or LACK thereof. It never ended well. So taking the advice of so many wonderful friends I have adopted the “don’t do the same things and expect a different reaction.”

Now when Angry Guy asks “Love me?” I look him straight in the eye and tell him EXACTLY what he wants to hear. “Of COURSE!” I say. Last night he added, “Are you IN love with me????” Ahhh…he thought he had me there. Kitty has learned believe me so Kitty looked Angry guy right in the eyes and though of the wonderful things he does do for our family and managed to say “Of course. I am IN love with you.” Of course my kids were looming and my daughter made a big fuss of the whole thing by telling me that I should “tell Daddy that you love him more!” TRAITOR!

Does Kitty think Angry Guy is suspicious of my prowling? Maybe. Sometimes I feel a little paranoid after T-Bone tells me stories about how his friends catch their wives cheating. The only clue that Angry Guy can possibly pick up on is that I am no longer nagging him for sex and I am as pleasant as pleasant can be.

Before this opens a whole dialogue about why Angry Guy won’t fuck Kitty let me say that I have gone over this and over this for years. I have gone over it with friends. I have gone over it with each and every one of my lovers. Kitty has an idea why Angry Guy is not as sexual as Kitty but Kitty can’t force Angry Guy to see a doctor. Kitty can’t force Angry Guy to stop smoking, eat healthy, exercise. A wise friend of mine told me that her husband drives her bananas. They have been married for years and years. One day she told me “I can’t change him. I can only change my reaction to him.” I couldn’t agree more.


Luna Moon said...

That is so true, you can't change someone...it really is an issue of changing your reaction. That is how I am after years of wanting to change my husband.

I also go through the "Do you love me?" question with my husband on a regular basis. I do love him, but not in the way he wants me to love him...but *of course* I tell him I love him.

Why do I stay? I was thinking about this last night and I realize that I *need* the stability of my marriage...the day-in-and-day-out routine. However, I absolutely *crave* the excitement that having an affair brings.

I'm satisfying both sides of me...very selfish, I know. But true!

Anonymous said...

Hmmmm... I know this road, just in reversel. When she says she Loves me, I just say I Know Dear.


Naughty Kitty said...

I know exactly how you feel Luna.unfortunately I have yet to find my drake. I doubt I ever will.

Same sassy girl said...

I get the "Why do you love me?" thing. Good advice - I read it over several times... will try to change my reaction. Anyone who can figure out why Hubby won't sleep with me might win the Nobel Prize.

Naughty Kitty said...

Oh yeah that's coming next..."WHY do you love me?" I'll be armed for that day. Thanks for the heads up. We (girls) have to stick together.